Save the Dates, Invitations, and a bit on RSVPs

Sending out Save the Dates and Invitations are SUCH fun parts of wedding planning. For so many people this is the first step that makes everything feel real. Soak in these vital steps, and feel confident you are doing it right by reading the information below!

Before reading on, here are two super useful tips!

Pro-tip #1: A common mistake people make is ordering for guest count instead of household.

Mistake: ordering 250 invitations for 250 guests

Pro planning: ordering 1 invitation per household (i.e average household 3 people/house: 250 divided by 3 = ~83 Save the Dates and invitations)

Pro-tip #2: Order extra! You may want to invite additional people and you will probably want one for keepsake. While you still don’t need to order one for every single guest, rounding up is always good in case you make new friends, have people drop out that you want to replace, or just want a few extra for your own (or parents, family, close friends, etc.) keepsake! Another huge pro to this- the big name stationary sites base their discounts on round numbers, so ordering 100 vs. 84 will end up being less expensive.

Mistake- Ordering 84 save the dates/invitations for ~83 households.

Pro planning: Ordering 100 save the dates/invitations for ~83 house holds.

Save the Dates

Save the Dates are a great way to mentally prepare your guests for your upcoming wedding. You might not have all the details like time, location, attire, meal plan, etc. hammered out, but a Save the Date will let guests know the most basic information about the wedding to plan for. While these are helpful with communicating this information to guests, they do add some cost to your wedding and aren’t necessary for every situation.

When are Save the Dates REALLY needed?

Save the Dates can be useful for every wedding, but you don’t HAVE to have them for any wedding. If you are tight on money, time, or simply just don’t want them you can skip them altogether. Save the Dates are most useful when planning either a destination wedding or when planning a wedding where most of your guests will be traveling. In a situation where guests will need to be traveling it is useful to let everyone know ahead of time. Save the Dates allow guests the opportunity to save money/sent money aside for travel and gifts, communicate with work, and plan for childcare (if necessary).

When should I send my Save the Dates out?

Save the Dates can be sent whenever you have solidified a date and location. You can technically send them before a venue is booked if you are 100% positive of the city and date the wedding will be held, but it is best to send them once the venue is booked. Couples will often fall in love with a venue that isn’t available on their desired date, so they change the date to accommodate the venue. If the date you have chosen means a lot to you and you are positive you will be selecting a venue based on the date and not the other way around, go ahead and send the Save the Dates!

If you are having a lot of out of town guests or planning a destination wedding Save the Dates ideally will be sent a full year in advance. If your wedding is more intimate and still requires a majority of guests to travel, Save the Dates should be sent in the 6-8 month prior range, if possible. If you are planning a more intimate wedding in a shorter time span it may be more efficient to skip the Save the Dates, touch base personally with guests to give them a heads up, and send invitations a little sooner than you would typically.

What is the latest I should send a Save the Date?

This, again, will vary depending on the situation. The absolute latest in any situation that you should send a Save the Date is 2 months out from the wedding (and this still only works for a really intimate wedding with short planning period). For a larger wedding this deadline should be by the 4 month mark. For a larger travel heavy wedding this deadline should be 5 months out. If you can’t make this deadline, skip the Save the Dates altogether and just send an invitation. Even for an intimate wedding, 2 months would be cutting it pretty close. Keep in mind, you will need to confirm with the venue and caterers the final headcount about a month prior to the wedding so you need to have time for people to receive their Save the Date and invitation and then RSVP.

What information should my Save the Dates include?

Save the Dates are just a quick, formal heads up to guests that you will be hosting a wedding on a particular date in a certain city. At minimum the Save the Date should include your names, date, and city. A lot of couples will build a wedding website and include that on the Save the Date as well. Even if the wedding website isn’t 100% completed (and frankly at this point it probably won’t be) providing the link will give guests a resource to check in to for more information as it is made available. If you have your venue locked in you can also include this in the Save the Date.

What should my Save the Dates look like?

Like everything else with a wedding, this completely depends on what you want. A common trend is for people to use a photo from their engagement session as the background of their Save the Date. Another common trend is for people to make their Save the Dates magnets so people can keep them on their fridge or somewhere convenient to find the information.

Invitations

What information should I include in my invitations?

Invitations should be a quick snapshot of all the vital information guests need to know in order to show up to the right place at the right time on the right day. They should include the who, what, when, where, and why of the day (not necessarily in that order). Include both the bride(s) and/or groom(s) names. If someone other than yourselves are paying for a chunk, the majority, or all of the wedding it is common to word your invitation: “X and X invite you to the wedding of their [son/daughter/other- name] to [fiance name here].” The name and address of the venue is vital. They will also need to know what time to arrive. If you have a wedding website you can include the website and let people know that they can RSVP and find more info there. If you don’t have a wedding website, you’ll need to include an RSVP card and pre-stamped envelope for guests to send back. You’ll also need to include a meal card if necessary, attire expectation (even if super casual, let them know!! No one wants to show up in a ball gown when everyone else is in sun dresses!), whether kids are invited or not, hotel block information (even if you don’t have a room block, they will need to know!), transportation accommodations, and information on events surrounding the wedding (pre-wedding welcome event, after wedding brunch etc.). Again, if you have a wedding website, you can list all of this info on the website and have your invite include just the very basics.

Pro-tip: directing guests to a wedding website for more info is a great option if possible. You can update information as plans evolve, include an FAQ page so guests can refer to this instead of having everyone individually reach out to you with questions, and, last but certainly not least, you can have your registry on your website so when guests visit to RSVP they can conveniently purchase a gift.

What should my invitations look like?

Again, the aesthetics of the invitations completely depend on your taste. If possible, it is ideal to have your invitations aesthetic inline with your wedding. Chose colors, shapes, and fonts that are relatively similar to those that will be at your wedding. This will help with a few things. First, this will give guests an idea of what to expect. It can set the tone of formality and give them an idea into color scheme. If you don’t want people to dress in the same colors as your bridal party or vice versa, let them know! Either way, invitations are a great ay to start communicating what those colors will be. Second, photographers love to capture your invitation as a prop on the wedding day. Having this match the overall aesthetic will create for some more cohesive pictures. Again, this is just a suggestion. It is your wedding and there are no rules; do literally whatever you want.

When should I send my invitations?

This will vary depending on a few factors. Some things to consider: when do you need to confirm numbers with the caterer and venue? How many people will be traveling for your wedding? How many people are you inviting (the more people you invite, the more people you will need to track down to confirm RSVP status!!)? For reference, for an average wedding of 150 guests with 33% traveling domestically, you should send the invitations out 2.5 months prior to the wedding, with the RSVP date 1-1.5 months prior to the wedding depending on catering and venue requirements.

When should I have guests RSVP by?

For your own sake, it is best to set the RSVP date at least 1 month prior to your date. Guest count will alter your seat/table count, plate count, party favor count, etc. Never have I ever been a part of a wedding of any size where 100% of the guests RSVP on time on their own without a nudge. Giving yourself some extra time will help alleviate some of the planning that just can’t be done until the final headcount is in. While a month is the minimum, I highly recommend giving yourself at least 1.5 months so you have a full 2 weeks to track people down and get all RSVPs. If you are having a wedding with over 250 guests, give yourself a full 2 months. Even if you are having a wedding of 1,000 don’t give yourself more than 2 months, though. Expectedly, things happen in our guests lives and anything longer than 2 months will allow for too many unforeseeable variables in guests lives and you’ll have to do a lot of adjusting as people’s plans change.

Some great resources to purchase your Save the Dates and/or invitations

There are plenty of boutique vendors that can create incredible custom pieces for you. Everyone will have a different niche aesthetic. If you are looking for something on the less niche and more affordable end check out the following:

www.vistaprint.com

Why I love them- you can really create whatever look you are going for. There are some preset templates you can use if you are ~creatively challenged~ or you can fully customize your own cards if you’re into DIYing the design. Their prints are consistent and good quality. Another huge plus, they are CHEAP.

Pro-tip- Google discount codes before ordering! They are almost ALWAYS running a special. If you can’t find one, create an account BEFORE creating your cards. Save your design and then sit back and wait. Within a week they will email you a discount code.

www.minted.com

Why I love them- Their designs are lovely, their prints are consistent, and they give my clients a discount. Use my code: WEDPLLA for 35% off Save the Dates and 25% off all wedding things.

www.basicinvite.com

Why I love them- My very favorite thing about this site is they offer clear invitations for about $1 each. The next least expensive clear option I have found is $8/each. The price is unbeatable. They offer plenty of other designs or fully customizable blank slate options as well. The prints are consistent and good quality. They allow you to fully customize the invitations and Save the Dates.

Pro-tip- look for discount codes! They aren’t as common as Vistaprint discount codes, but their prices are already lower so it balances out. It is still worth looking for a code though!

Have additional questions? Feel free to reach out via email! theweddingplannerla@gmail.com

As always, happy planning!!

Select Your Vendors Like a Pro

Selecting vendors can be a daunting task. There are SO many options out there so how can you be sure you are making a good choice? It is challenging selecting vendors that fit in your budget or are worth stretching the budget for! There are a few specific steps I take when sifting through and vetting vendors before sending them to my clients. Follow these steps and you’ll be picking vendors like a pro!

***Before you get going on vendor research, I highly recommend making a full budget!! Making a full, realistic budget will help guide your vendor selection. See my full budget guide here***

Decide on a general vision for each specific vendor-

Before diving into the deep end of vendor research, have an idea of what you are after. A few things to shape this vision: budget, what you hope to get out of your contract with this vendor (i.e. how many hours, how many assistants, etc.), what “style” do you want (i.e. what kind of venue do you want, what style of photography do you like, what kind of food do you want, etc.).

1. Venue- indoor, outdoor, mix of both, beach, woods, mountains, all inclusive, DIY, somewhere in between, how late do you want to be there into the evening, will they be hosting other events in the space that day, will they take care of trash removal, do they provide restrooms, power, or any other basic amenities, do they provide tables, chairs, an arbor, a bar space,etc.? For reference, a wedding with 100 guests at a venue that provides only power and restrooms will cost about $7k in rentals, if you go with the most basic rental options. This should absolutely be factored in to your overall cost when selecting a venue.

2. Wedding Planner- do you want to be involved in wedding planning or do you want to think about it as little as possible? You will spend a lot of time with your wedding planner and your wedding planner needs to be able to see YOUR vision in order to create your special day. Make sure that this is someone you are ready and excited to spend time with!

3. Photographer- do you want light and airy, dark and moody, true to color, posed photos, raw emotions, or a mix, how many hours will you need them, do you need 2 photographers or will one suffice (2 are recommended for larger guest counts and spread out venues), do you want an engagement shoot, how many photos are you hoping to get back? Ask to see a full wedding album instead of just the highlights!

4. Videographer- what do you want included in the video? Montage of key events throughout the day, full vows, speeches, and special dances, or a combo of the above? Be sure to look through several examples so you have a clear idea of what your edit will include.

5. Caterer- what kind of food do you want, how will it be served, will they provide apps as well, do they offer plates, cups, and flatware rentals, how experienced are they with larger events, do they provide bussers?

6. DJ/Musician- will they make announcements for you throughout the event, how many sound systems will they bring (you will need 2-3 for most venues if you are doing ceremony, cocktail hour, and reception in different spaces), will they allow you to provide song requests, do they have experience playing to a crowd, can they provide a microphone for the ceremony and reception, how active are they on the mic? HINT: A sound system is the full set up which will include a set of speakers (1-2 speakers for ceremony cocktail hour, 2+ speakers for dinner/dancing), microphone (confirm this with your DJ! Some charge extra), amp, mixer, music device (usually a laptop), and dance floor lighting (where appropriate).

7. Bar- do you need a full service bar, or would you like to build your own bar and hire just the bartenders? Will your venue allow you to DIY the bar? If you are DIYing the bar, will you ned to rent the physical bar? Are you bartenders licensed?

8. Florist- do you want more “traditional” bouquets and centerpieces or would you like something else? Are you looking for other decor rental? A lot of florists also offer vases, candles, and other decor to add to your order. Be sure to look through their portfolios! If you have a go-to florist you typically use, but are looking for a different style, show them some examples of what you would like and see if it is something they have experience with or feel comfortable doing. A lot of florists will do special designs that are outside of their norm but not show examples of this work on their Instagram or website because it isn’t “on brand.”

9. Dessert- what kind of dessert do you want, how do you want your cake to look, how many tiers do you wants the cake to have, will they deliver or do your desserts need to be picked up?

10. Hair and makeup- up-do, hair down, braiding, something in between, heavy contour makeup, natural look, something in between? Be sure to look through portfolios and ask for a trial run day! Trial runs are very important! Not just to make sure you like the styles they come up with but also to see how long your hair and makeup are holding up throughout the day.

11. Rentals- does the company offer unique pieces that will work with your venue, are the rates competitive with other comparable companies in your area, what will they charge for delivery, do they offer same day delivery and pick up, can they extend delivery and pick up is necessary?

Do your own research-

Recommendations from friends or professionals are a great place to start, but doing your own research to make sure they are a good fit for you is vital. Just because a friend or professional has had a good experience with someone, doesn’t mean they are going to be a great fit for you! Friends of friends may offer discounts, but if these people are not professionals then you may be wasting $400 instead of feeling good about spending $800. Ask to see pictures or videos of these “friendors” in action! If they do this professionally on the side, ask for a website or review site link! I’ve seen plenty of vendors that recommend other vendors that they haven’t worked with for a long time. Business quality can change overtime so it is important to confirm the recommended company is still worth your while!

Diversify your Research sources-

Conduct research from a few different angles. A quick google search might not yield the kind of options that you are looking for. WeddingWire, The Knot, Thumbtack, Facebook wedding groups, and sites like these will give you more diverse vendor options! Depending on the type of vendor you are looking for search on Instagram, too!

Always cross reference reviews-

Reviews can vary from platform to platform so it is important to cross reference and be sure that you are getting the most recent takes on the company. Some insight into review companies: anyone can leave a company reviews on Google so companies may ask their friends to leave reviews to raise their overall rating. WeddingWire is similar, but it is more challenging to leave a review on, so friends are less likely to pad the reviews for vendors. Yelp has an algorithm that is meant to weed out “fake” reviews, but a lot of real reviews are taken down in the process (there are also a lot of theories on their marketing approach that can also affect the reviews that show). Be sure to scroll down on the Yelp pages to the “unrecommended” section to read reviews that aren’t weighted in overall.

Read reviews with a different perspective-

Even if you like the quote a company sends and they have five stars across review platforms, be sure to read the reviews and look for consistencies. For example, if I’m looking for DJ/MCs and I see a lot of five star reviews saying how the MC "is really active on the mic,” I’m not going to send that company to a couple who really just wants music and a few key announcements.

Schedule phone or in-person meetings before booking-

It is important to feel comfortable on your wedding day and your vendors a huge part of your comfort! You will spend so much time with certain vendors on your actual wedding day, and even the ones that you won’t, they will still interact with guests! If you have a vendor that runs a little high strung, they may create unnecessary anxiety on your special day. A great way to accommodate this is to make sure your personalities mesh beforehand!

Read through your contracts very, very closely-

This is a legally binding document that should protect you as well as the vendor. Make sure that there is fine print written in about what will happen in the event of cancelation (on either the couple AND vendors part). Numbers and dates should be firm (I.e. by what date will you get sneak peek pics back, when can you expect the full album back, how many photos can you expect back, etc. These examples are specific to photos, but all contracts should be quantitative and clear. This does not apply when booking a wedding planner if you don’t already have a venue secured). A contract that doesn’t protect you is definitely a red flag!! If you find any of these issues and bring them up to a vendor and they are unwilling to adjust the contract to protect you, that is a major red flag and a good sign that you should continue your search!

Other notable tips:

1. A vendor’s experience doesn’t necessarily chalk up to quality of service! Just because someone hasn’t been working weddings specifically for a long time doesn’t mean they should be immediately counted out. If you like their style, food, etc., they are well informed on the effort that weddings take, and they are ready to do what it takes to do an awesome job on your wedding they are still worth considering. If you unsure about them, ask your wedding planner or coordinator! They may be able to offer valuable insight to make sure you are making the best decisions for your wedding!

2. Break up your search into several days. It is easy to get burnt out on sifting through vendors. Packages start to run together, things that would normally stick out become easy to overlook, and the whole experience may become less enjoyable.

3. Be thorough! Don’t settle! You can find the perfect vendor out there for you!

Be sure to check out my preferred vendors list to kick start your search!

Useful links:

Budget planning tips: https://www.theweddingplannerla.com/blog/wedding-budgeting-the-first-step-to-planning

My preferred vendors: https://www.theweddingplannerla.com/resources

Day of Decor/Photo Op Props Checklist

As you think through your wedding day and are organizing the pieces you have bought or rented, work through this list to make sure you have accounted for everything! This will be particularly helpful as you are in those final stages and packing everything up to be moved to the venue! Remember, every wedding is unique and you may not want to incorporate some of these pieces. If you don’t want some piece, don’t force it just because it is on this list! If you have planned for other pieces, feel free to copy and paste this then add in your own specific bullet points.

Getting Ready Space:

• Food

• Something to serve food on

• Plates

• Napkins

• Drinks

• Something to serve drinks from

• Something to drink drinks from

• Signage

• Invitation/Save the Dates (for pictures)

• Speakers to play music from

• Phone or other device to play music from (pro tip: if you are getting ready in a place that won’t have wifi or cell reception download your playlist ahead of time!)

• Special hanger for dress

• Something to wear while getting ready

Ceremony:

• Altar flowers

• Altar Floor decor

• Aisle decor

• Ceremony programs

• Table for special ceremonies (i.e. sand ceremony, glass ceremony, wine ceremony, etc.)

• Decor for special ceremony table

• Signs (welcome, unplugged ceremony signs, etc.)

• Easel for signs

Cocktail Hour:

Gift table

• Linen

• Sign for gift table

• Card box

• Guest book

• Pen(s) for guest book

• Something to hold pens

• Decor for gift table

• Flowers for gift table

Appetizer table

• Linen

• Signs/labels for apps

• Serving utensils for apps

• Plates

• Forks

• Napkins

Self service drink station table

• Linen

• Drink dispenser

• Labels for beverages

• Cups

Bar

• Bar menu

• Flowers

Reception Area:

Seating chart

• Easel for seating chart

• Flowers to dress up easel

Place card table

• Linen

• Place cards

• Sign for place cards

• Flowers

• Other decor

Cake/dessert table

• Linen

• Display for cake

• Cake topper

• Serving set of cake knife and server

• Plates for cake

• Forks for cake

• Napkins

• Cake stand(s)

• Other display items for other desserts

• Other decor

• Flowers

Sweetheart table

• Linen

• Special plates

• Special cups

• Flatware

• Napkins

• Flowers for the top of table

• Other decor for top of table

• Flowers for front of table

• Other decor for front of table

Guest tables

• Linen

• Flowers

• Candles

• Table number

• Table number stands

• Other decor/personal touches

• Plates

• Flatware

• Drinkware

• Napkins